I know, I know, you’re looking at it and saying to yourself “What a cute little selvege project. I sure wish I had a little travel sewing kit that looked like that!”. Well, maybe you aren’t saying that to yourself. But you should be, because it is cute, I don’t disagree with that. But wait!

Unfortunately I forgot to take into account that the cover would not be stiff enough to keep the pockets inside pulled tight. And so, if you just tip it ever so slightly…..

Every freaking thing inside falls out! Argh. Fail!

I can’t do a google search and go past page one without feeling that I am somehow offending the gods. This had led to all manner of rearranging and redefining search terms in hopes that what I’m looking for will show up in the first 10 entries and therefore be legit.

Did I mention I’m not a geek?

Anyway, what reminded me of this image? I was viewing my pathetic website stats (really? 20 some hits yesterday… yip. ee.) and one of my favorite parts is checking out the search terms that people use to find me. Yeah, top terms? “Ribbon Storage Box“. Followed closely by any manner of those three words with the word “tutorial”. Second? “Simplicity 3835“. There are lots more. Several have had me raising my eyebrows. Seriously, who googles “www.jmday.com” instead of just going there? And I’m not sure who this other “Alexis in Texas” is, but I’m willing to bet the persons searching for that are not looking for pie.

But today… Today I got the weirdest search yet. “A”. Yeah, just the letter all by itself. No wait, it was actually “a”. Ok, I had to go try that one for myself. I clicked through 50 search result pages without finding even a hint of this blog. I mean, I knew I wasn’t going to be at the top of the list… or even near the middle, but how desperate was the guy who was doing that search? And what the hell was he looking for?*

And** just because we’re talking letters (ok, we’re not, I’m just rambling on as usual) I have to mention this awesome quilt over at Stitched In Color. This picture in particular just speaks to me. What does it say, you ask?

“R is for Argyle“, of course.

*By the way, if you were the one who did this search, I’d love to hear about it… And if you aren’t a guy, my apologies.

**And don’t I start a lot of my sentences with “and”? I wonder what would happen if you googled “and”… Hmmm. Someone do it and report back. I don’t have time to click through 99 pages of search results.

So Chris answers all of the questions with her standing over his shoulder coaching him. When he finishes (and the bonus question was hard I tell ya — it was a trick question — there is no cell E1!) she looks at him and snatches the page and says, “I’m going to grade it now.” Which she does with very little fanfare.

As it turns out she was actually supposed to return this parental homework, but she left it sitting on the computer desk between us. I picked it up to take it to her homework bag — don’t ask me, I don’t know why they don’t just use a folder — when I noticed the grade she gave Chris.

+++A+++

Seriously. I guess he passed.

When she finished reading the passage tonight, Chris asked her if she knew what the book she was reading from was. Smartly, she closes the book and reads the title aloud. “The Chocolate Living Bible”

That’s my girl!

Names have been changed to protect the innocent gift recipients

me: godI could so easily spend $75 on yarn to get free shippingno comment?Chris: nope, I understand how that worksme: :)wellI put the fawn in the cart  then went looking for kid friendly machine washable wool…found it$10/skein… 1 skein per kidChris: cool me: so that’s like 35 bucksbut then… I started lamenting giving my new petting yarn awayeven though I bought it for xxxxxxxChris: there is a blog in here somewhereme: oh godyou’re rightexcept your mom reads itso the question iscan I justify spending $44 on yarn that I will likely just pet?Chris: in the long run….  it’s cheaper than a cat me: LMAO  that is so greatI just want you to tell me to buy it even though I was bitching about money this morningChris: thank you, I’ll be here all week, enjoy the buffetbuy it even though you were bitching about money this morningme: hehdid you cut and paste?;)Chris: pretty muchhighlighted and draggedme: I’ll probably kick myself on 1/1… but I can pet my new cat and feel betterChris: definitely a blog in thisme: good thing google auto saves these conversations

Alexis sits up and looks at the TV incredulously, and spouts, “Um, duuuh. First we are babies.”

She’s even gone so far as to bring me the 800 number written in orange marker on the back of my credit card bill. I stared at it and wondered how she remembered such a long number when she can’t even remember her birthday. Without me even asking she spouts, “I paused the TiVo and wrote down the number for you momma so you can buy me this.” Never mind that it’s for Betty Crocker’s green bags, a product that keeps your vegetables and fruits fresh for up to 40 days! (She informed my mother and I of that little fact in the car on the way home from San Antonio on Sunday.)

I now have a stack of 800 numbers written by her that is at least 10 deep. I don’t even know what any of them are for because she only writes the number, never the name of the product. Yet, I can’t throw them away because pausing the TiVo to write down the number is just too ingenious, and I know some day I will look at those papers and laugh even harder than I am already.

I know at least one of those numbers is for another Betty Crocker product. Some sort of cake decorating kit. We tried to explain to her that we already own everything that they ship in the kit. She looked at us and said, “but if you order within the next 15 minutes it comes complete with a storage box!”  She might be watching too much TV.